Open mouth. Insert foot. Or spoon.
“Let your wife be a fountain of blessing for you. Rejoice in the wife of your youth.” Proverbs 5:18
I am known to stir the pot. In fact, I took a silly Facebook quiz recently that said I am 40% mean and I “annoy people on purpose.” I must admit. It’s true.
I believe in challenging Christians to think deeper, think wider, think more along the lines of what Christ taught us through His life and actions. Besides, if we aren’t challenged every now and then, we won’t know what we believe and why we believe it. So, consider me the God-appointed agitator. Please remember that as you read on….
The verse above means a great deal to me. Tommy and I married when I was 18 and he was 19. He is nine months older than me. If you’ve known me or followed me for long, you know I truly believe I was conceived the very day Tommy was born. Do I believe in soul mates? Only in a spiritual sense of the word. I believe God created Tommy to be with me and vice versa. We had to keep that appointment in mind during the tough and lean years of our marriage. Do I believe people marry the wrong person? You betcha! I believe most divorces are caused by premature marriages. We are in such a hurry to get married that we settle for less instead of waiting for God’s best!
Some of us are lucky enough to find those people at a young age. Others must search awhile. Either way, the treasure discovered is worth the wait.
I also believe there are those of us who pass up God’s elected mate for us because we want to see the world, experience life as a single adult, and shop the mate market. I do believe God can bless a marriage whether or not it is the “right” person that He hand-selected for us. But I believe the strongest marriages are built by two Christians who trust that God brought them together. These committed individuals are willing to stand the test of time, forsaking all others until death parts us.
There seems to be a trend these days (here I go…. stirring the pot) of forsaking the mate of our youth in order to recapture our youth. There seems to be more and more men reconnecting with lost loves, leaving their wives and families, and reinitiating a relationship with someone from their past. Sadly, they try to take up where they left off. You know the saying, “We can never go backwards?” It’s true. We can try, but God will not bless a union that has torn a family apart for two people to try and feel young again. Sorry. That’s the truth. Well, it’s the TRUTH. It is a spiritual truth that God wants us to remain faithful to our commitments; most especially in marriage.
So, what about the bad marriages? Does God expect us to be unhappy by remaining committed to our marriage vows? I don’t know. It is complicated. Ask God. What I do know is that many men are forsaking their wives in order to reset a relationship with women from their past. I don’t see God ordaining this behavior as much as I see mid-life crises driving the decision.
I suspect God wants to change us instead of granting us permission to change spouses. However, and there is a however, God’s love covers a multitude of sins; even multiple marriages.